This is a direct transcript of a teaching that was presented via video. Due to the fact that we often speak differently than we write, the written text may not flow and/or sound strange in some places. There may also be grammatical errors and unintended mistakes. It is encouraged that you to watch the video to complement this written transcript.
Biblical femininity. That’s kind of a tongue twister there, but we are talking about feminine attributes and the importance thereof and how Yahweh has created woman special, unique, beautiful, lovely– all kinds of wonderful character traits. And we are going to be exploring them.
If you missed the last segment, I encourage you to go ahead and you can type out a printable summary at: http://www.eliyah.com/masculinity.pdf, and of course the full teaching is in the transcripts page. And it comes from the Roman month of July 23rd, 2016.
Just click the very top there, “Archives.” Very top of EliYah.com. And click that link and it will take you right to the most recent studies. And this one was done on what’s called July 23rd, 2016. But the printable summary of the teaching, perhaps you can print it out, hang it on your refrigerator.
I hope to have one on femininity hopefully by next week you can print out. But for now, the one on masculinity can be found there.
You know, there is so much gender confusion in our world today and it is one reason I really feel led to explore this with you and share with you the things that I have found.
And I would have to say that I was approached actually with this topic several weeks ago by someone who had talked about it in relation to her clothing.
And I just got to thinking more and more about how the gender confusion that we see today is resulting in homosexuality and how it impacts our world today and the often oppressive agenda that the homosexual groups are trying to take away our freedoms to practice our faith and things like that. And this all comes down to gender confusion.
And so, we need to examine what the Scriptures actually teach about femininity and yield ourselves to those Scriptures so that we can fulfill our created purpose.
And, you know, as I began to study this, you know, one of the saddest things in our culture is the devaluing of women. What’s amazing is as women sought to stand up for their rights and gain power, it seems like they’ve become more and more devalued more so than valued. It’s really going backwards.
And so, where can we trace a lot of this to? Can we find any roots to anything? Can we find any, you know, because it used to be pretty much every woman was a homemaker and took care of the things that were necessary at home while the fathers, you know, went out to work and provided for the family.
And that had been the traditional expectations for thousands of years in multitudes of cultures. But we see some new ideas coming forth and I want to read this to you.
A political leader once said this: “We must now say proudly and without any exaggeration that apart from [the country this person is from], there is not a country in the world where women enjoy full equality and where women are not placed in the humiliating position felt particularly in day-to-day family life.”
They see this as a humiliating position to be in day-to-day family life.
“This is one of our first and most important tasks… Housework is the most unproductive, the most barbarous and the most arduous work a woman can do. It is exceptionally petty and does not include anything that would in any way promote the development of the woman…
“This will begin only when we have achieved the complete equality of women and when we undertake the new work together with women who have been emancipated from that petty stultifying, unproductive work… We are setting up model institutions, dining-rooms and nurseries, that will emancipate women from housework…
“These institutions that liberate women from their position as household slaves are springing up where it is in any way possible… Our task is to make politics available to every working woman.
“The chief thing is to get women to take part in socially productive labor, to liberate them from ‘domestic slavery,’ to free them from their stupefying [idiotic] and humiliating subjugation to the eternal drudgery of the kitchen and the nursery.
“This struggle will be a long one, and it demands a radical reconstruction, both of social technique and of morale. But it will end in the complete triumph of Communism.”
Communism. And these words were spoken by none other than Vladimir Lenin, who we all know was a very, very oppressive, murderous leader.
So they desired to recreate and revise the traditional role of women. Now this has made its way into America today. Lenin played a key role in communicating this Marxist vision of what he called the “new family.”
Both Lenin and Trotsky believed in the overthrow and destruction of the Biblical family. They sought to build a new state and that meant denigrating the Biblical notion of male headship and hierarchy within the family. It meant eliminating any sense that there would be a division of labor between man and wife.
This required delivering women from the “burdens” of childbirth and childcare. It meant adopting tools like birth control as guarantors that women could be free to remain in the workplace. And so, what we had was the state became the parents.
And with the separation of the family unit a void was left and parents now have to compete with the state to raise their children and with culture to raise their children and teachers at public schools and daycare centers and nurseries and everything. All these things.
And by the time the child reaches his teenage years, the father and mother are no longer the primary influence in the child’s life. And this void that’s left with Mom being in one place, Dad being in another place, the child being in another place, is now fulfilled by the state and by culture.
And the parents scratch their heads wondering what went wrong. I’m not saying that parents can’t overcome the challenge. I’m saying that in the way our society is being set up, it is very hostile to families who want to be close and parents who want to raise children to fear Elohim and walk in His ways.
And what I see in Scripture is a traditional model, the one that people call out-of-date and old fashioned. The older women are instructed, Titus chapter 2 and verses 3 through 5:
3 – the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things —
4 – that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,
5 – [to be] discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of Elohim may not be blasphemed.
That’s what Scripture teaches. Very different than Marxist vision. Very different.
Now I’m not trying to blame women for trying to be financially stable due to a high rate of divorce or mistreatment by lazy, gluttonous and philandering men in our society today, but what I want to point out is look what it did to the family unit.
In some cases it is fornication that is responsible for a woman being a single mom. In other cases it is an abusive husband that she had to get away from. In some cases where the women were in a marriage and they were very, very disrespectful and rebellious toward the husband and that tempted the man to become abusive.
He is at fault for being abusive, but we should never conduct our lives in such a way to become temptations to cause others to sin. And if a man is not very loving toward his wife, it makes it harder for her to respect him. And around and around it goes until someone is willing to stand up and be Messiah-like.
But, please, don’t misjudge me. If a man is being abusive, he has no excuse. He needs to come under the accountability of brothers in the faith. So I want to start this off right off the bat here. I want to address the single women and the married women who are having to provide for their households. Listen, Yahweh cares about you.
Sometimes you are in the situation you are in because of fornication or because of an abusive husband or abusive relationship you were in formally. Perhaps you just now came into the faith or came into the faith after these things have happened. Your children are at a disadvantage. It is just a natural result of these things.
It is not the ideal situation. But if you are in a situation where your husband, as the head of the household, is choosing to abuse the household, Yahweh has placed elders in a congregation to be in a place of authority and to bring both men and women to accountability. 1 Timothy 5:17 says:
17 – Let the elders who rule well be counted worthy of double honor, especially those who labor in the word and doctrine.
Let the elders who do what? Rule well. They have authority. So the office of the elders has to be respected by men rather than rejected. They do have authority, and unless they tell you to sin, they should be heeded.
And I say these things because so often a woman is being oppressed and abused and the men refuse to be accountable to anyone except themselves. And I say shame on them!
As a body of Messiah, we need to do better at standing up, not only for the fatherless and the widow, but the women and children who are made to feel that way by abusive and cruel men.
And so, daughters of Tsion, daughters of Zion, I want you to know, no matter what it is I share with you today, it is out of love and concern and inspiration from the holy Scriptures I say these things.
I don’t say them to give spiritual ammunition to husbands, but to give spiritual admonition to wives and women who want to embrace their femininity in a more biblical way.
Now in today’s society it seems that just as men have lost what it means to be men and to be gentlemen, women have lost what it means to be women and true ladies.
It’s not entirely our fault because a lot of it was done before we were born, but some of the longest lived women who are listening to the broadcast may remember a time when things were different and can relate to what I’m speaking of.
Women don’t seem to have the kind of respect for themselves anymore that they used to. Everything is sexualized and women are valued based on their outward appearance and their youth. And to me, one of the saddest things in our society is the idea that a woman’s worth is based on the pleasure she gives men with her physical appearance.
And that is a damnable idea. Because the truth is, women did not create herself. I mean, why then should her appearance determine her value and her worth? We should never debase women to such a ridiculous standard for judgment. Every woman has equal value and worth in the eyes of Yahweh, no matter what they look like. So it needs to be among us.
And ladies, you don’t have to alter your body or your face to increase your worth. Every woman is beautifully, fearfully and wonderfully made. Every baby coming from the womb is a beautiful and precious miracle.
I had a grandson that was born this week. Absolutely amazing miracle! Granddaughters… I don’t have one, yet… maybe one day. But every baby is a beautiful and precious miracle. Time and age do not change a baby’s worth or the child’s preciousness or their beauty.
Yahweh doesn’t look at the outward appearance. He looks at the heart. When He sees a woman’s heart, He sees a heart worth healing. He sees a heart worth cleansing. When He sees her soul, He sees a soul worth saving. He sees someone He wants to spend eternity with.
Every woman He created is a woman worthy of being loved. Every woman He created is a woman worthy of being valued and cherished. Our Savior who died for each and every one of you proved that. Don’t let any man convince you otherwise. Put your stock in what He says about you and what He created you to be. He created you to be distinctly feminine.
And so, what is biblical femininity? Can we really look to Scripture to find the answer without being influenced by stereotypes and tradition? Absolutely!
Starting with a woman’s anatomy, we see that they are created naturally to be nurturers. They are given the responsibility to nurse children and to bear children. They are uniquely suited for this purpose and by observation it can be noted that women tend to be more sensitive than men.
And Peter makes the following statement:
1 Peter 3:7
7 – Husbands, likewise, dwell with [them] with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as [being] heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
Malachi 2 says He will not answer the prayers of a treacherous man.
Now when it says “weaker vessel,” “weak” does not mean “pathetic and helpless.” It simply means that Yahweh created women to be nurturers, He created them to be very relationship oriented, and therefore more vulnerable to being hurt.
Words that might not seem harmful to a man can hurt a women because she was built to be more relationship oriented so that she could provide the proper care for her children and her husband. And therefore, she is more vulnerable and more fragile.
For instance, if a total stranger came up to you and started calling you names, would that hurt as much as it would if it were, say, your own father or your own spouse? No! Because you have a relationship with them. There’s something there. There’s a love connection. And so, the more you love someone, the more it hurts when they hurt you.
But women are more relationship oriented and therefore more vulnerable to being hurt and to really feeling it in a deeper way. It is for this reason men are called to be dwelling with them with understanding, giving honor to the weaker vessel, and heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
She is more fragile. And what do you do when something is marked fragile? What do you do with the package? They always mark it: HANDLE WITH CARE. Right?
So I praise Yahweh for the sensitivity because the sensitivity can teach us how to be more careful. I don’t think I’m there, yet, in my level of sensitivity that I need to be. I’m sure my wife has a lot more to teach me in this.
But a woman’s vulnerability is an asset, not a negative attribute. And we men can benefit from an example of sensitivity toward others and learn from that.
But we tend to have less of that trait so that we can bear the load when things are really going crazy, so that we can be the strong and steady leader in the face of the storms of life. Otherwise, we might crumble in the day of adversity with too much on our shoulders.
And I love it how the man and the woman complement each other if we embrace how we are created to be. Women sometimes feel like they need to compensate and harden themselves, becoming more calloused and brash and rough. But you don’t.
Yahweh gave you that nurturing spirit so that you could love and nurture those children with the kind of sensitivity needed for them to know there is love in this cruel and dark world that they’ve entered. They need to know that. And a baby’s first encounter with love will come through its mother.
The mother and child bond is seen throughout the pages of Scripture. Isaiah 49:14 says:
14 – But Zion said, “YAHWEH has forsaken me, And YAHWEH has forgotten me.”
15 – “Can a woman forget her nursing child, And not have compassion on the son of her womb? Surely they may forget, Yet I will not forget you.
Speaking of the rarity of such a thing. And then He says:
16 – See, I have inscribed you on the palms [of My hands]; Your walls [are] continually before Me.
So compassion, remembering the nursing child. And what do we see in our culture today? The very opposite: “Let’s take my nursing child and put him in a daycare center to be raised by strangers.”
You know, Solomon counted on this bond between the mother and child in the famous court case where both the mothers claimed the same baby. And Solomon said, “Well, take a sword and divide the baby in two.” And the true mother cried out for the life of her baby. And by that, he knew who the mother was.
Here is a beautiful picture here in Psalm 131, verses 1 through 2. It says:
1 – YAHWEH, my heart is not haughty, Nor my eyes lofty. Neither do I concern myself with great matters, Nor with things too profound for me.
2 – Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul, Like a weaned child with his mother; Like a weaned child [is] my soul within me.
It’s a beautiful picture. I mean, the child is weaned. His soul is calmed and quieted. The child has experienced the nurturing love from a mother and the child is secure. The child is at peace. The child has experienced the consistent love and nurture from its mother and is with its mother, a source of consistent love and care.
So common was this in Israel. Mothers did their job in Israel. Babies and toddlers had this attribute of being calm and quiet.
Ladies, listen, we have in our generation a growing number of babies who haven’t even attached and bonded to their own mothers. And those who grow up without having attached and bonded to their mothers will have something called reactive attachment attributes.
Some cases are extremely severe to where the child can’t even comprehend the value of human life. They’ve been known to murder their own parents and siblings and not have an ounce of regret or remorse. It can get that bad. Read about it. It’s true. It’s sad.
And lower levels of reactive attachment children tend to have mental illnesses as adults, such as borderline personality disorder, which is simply an adult version of reactive attachment.
But Yahushua can come and heal these things even if it takes years for them to form new habits and literally change their personality in how they see life. But what I’m saying, mothers, is this: Your children need you. They deserve you. Men cannot give them what women can give them. Babies need their mamas.
Yahweh built you for that. Your very anatomy shows you that. But modern society says, “No, go out and be somebody.”
Oh, you can still have children. Thanks to the progressive ideas of Josef Stalin and Vladimir Lenin, we can have the nursing centers now to relieve you of your duties and that so-called eternal drudgery of the nursery and slavery of the kitchen. But I plead with you, babies need their mamas.
And sure, yeah, children are resilient. They may be able to manage life, but they will not have the level of security Yahweh created them to have and they may struggle with trusting Yahweh later in life and being secure in their relationship with Him and even with their future husband, which creates problems in future marriages.
You know, the women of old were so devoted to loving and nurturing and caring for the little ones, David described his own trust in Yahweh, his hope in Yahweh, as being like that of a weaned child with its mother.
He didn’t feel the need to concern himself with profound and great things. He just knew he was safe in Yahweh’s care… like a child with his mother. And so, he calls on Israel to put their hope in Yahweh in the same manner.
I’m sorry I don’t have verse 3 here, but read verse 3. He tells them, “Hope in Yahweh.” Like this. Like a child with its mother. A weaned child with its mother.
And Paul illustrated his love… Now they weaned their children, you know, between 3 and 5 years of age in those days. So think about that.
But Paul illustrated his love for the brothers at Thessalonica like a nursing mother cherishes her children.
1 Thessalonians 2:7-8
7 – But we were gentle among you, just as a nursing [mother] cherishes her own children.
8 – So, affectionately longing for you, we were well pleased to impart to you not only the gospel of Elohim, but also our own lives, because you had become dear to us.
“As a nursing mother cherishes her own children.” Beautiful picture. Love, cherish, the little ones Yahweh has placed in their care.
Little babies are born into a world that’s often cruel and heartless, and they need a strong foundation to effectively be prepared for what lies ahead.
Cherishing, caring, nurturing, valuing children, these are beautiful feminine attributes that Yahweh has instilled in women that we should all appreciate and be thankful for.
12 – For thus says YAHWEH: “Behold, I will extend peace to her like a river, And the glory of the Gentiles like a flowing stream. Then you shall feed; On [her] sides shall you be carried, And be dandled on [her] knees.
13 – As one whom his mother comforts, So I will comfort you; And you shall be comforted in Jerusalem.”
A comforting mother, a character trait of Yahweh Himself.
See, women of old carried their newborns in a sling so they could just, you know, be carried on their sides. They had a little sling and they would put their babies on their side. They still make them these days.
Because that’s a tough adjustment. You are talking leaving the comfort of a womb. There’s never any change in temperature. Every need is always provided for. You never experience hunger. You are just growing.
And they come out of the womb and there’s cold and there’s light and there’s heat and there’s hunger and there’s pain and things that they never experienced before.
And so, they would take those babies and they would put them in the sling so they always were up against mom. They felt mama always being there so they could adjust to life outside the womb. Because they realized that the baby just left an entirely comfortable environment and would benefit from that constant presence of the mother.
And whenever I see babies in a nursery, you know, and they don’t have any covering or like things, I just, ah, I just feel like they need to be with their mom. I mean, women highly cherished and appreciated the role Yahweh gave them. The most horrifying thought was the idea of being barren.
I mean, Rachel told Jacob to give her children or she would die. Hannah was so desperate to have a child she was willing to give the child to Yahweh to be raised by a priest once it was weaned.
And sometimes Yahweh would cause women to be barren for a time like Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, Elizabeth, the wife of Manoah. Elizabeth was the mother of John the Baptist.
I think a lot of times this barrenness was allowed to happen so that these women would be the kind of super moms needed to give these men the foundation necessary to endure the calling that they had ahead of them.
But, you know, either way, it seems that Yahweh has uniquely equipped women for the task and these attributes complement the husband and wife team. Men, you know, I tell you what, men melt like butter with a woman’s soft, feminine, gentle, loving, nurturing personality and touch. We do!
The beauty of that attribute is beyond my ability to really explain, but it’s part of what attracts a man to a woman. Because opposites attract. And such an attribute is also very precious in the eyes of Yahweh.
1 Peter 3:3-4
3 – Do not let your adornment be [merely] outward — arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on [fine] apparel —
4 – rather [let it be] the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible [beauty] of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of Elohim.
Very, very precious in the sight of Elohim is the gentle and quiet spirit. Femininity is very precious in the sight of Elohim.
This word translated “gentle,” what does it mean? It says: “mildness of disposition.” It is having a mild personality, not bold, brash and rude. “Mildness of disposition,” “gentleness of spirit,” “meekness,” meaning “patient,” “caring,” and “gentle.”
The word translated “quiet” means: “to be tranquil,” “to be quiet,” “to be peaceable.” That’s how it’s translated in one place.
Now compare these attributes to a woman who is not righteous, who is worldly. Proverbs chapter 9, verse 13, says:
13 – A foolish woman is clamorous; [She is] simple, and knows nothing.
Proverbs 7:11 says:
11 – She [was] loud and rebellious, Her feet would not stay at home.
What does it mean to be “clamorous”? The word is not a very common word in our language, but looking here at the Hebrew, “chamah,”… “hamah,” I should say… “to murmur, growl, roar, cry aloud… sound, make noise, tumult, to be clamorous, be disquieted, be loud, be moved, to be troubled, be in an uproar, to growl, to murmur, to roar…
“to be in a stir, to be in a commotion, to be boisterous” and “turbulent.”
These are the characteristics present in a woman who is not operating in the way Yahweh created her to be. She does not have the mild disposition or personality that Yahweh finds precious. She’s not quiet. She’s disquieted, unstable in her demeanor, boisterous and loud and turbulent. Do we see the difference here? Do you see the difference?
I’m not saying any of this to put a muzzle on women’s mouths so that, “They need to speak up. They need to speak up.” In fact, I’m not saying this at all. Yahweh’s Word is saying this. I’m passing the word along.
Yes, there’s a time to speak. There’s a time to refrain from speaking. It’s not saying women need to shut-up and never have a voice in this world. We men need your voice. You have the nurturing and sensitive perspective that men can seriously benefit from.
But let correction always be from a quiet, tranquil disposition and personality. Let it be from a gentleness of spirit, a meekness, words of wisdom from a time of meditation and prayer rather than, you know, the thought goes in the mind, it goes right out the mouth, with no stop sign in between. And that is something we all need to be, not just women.
But Matthew 12:36 says:
36 – “But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment.
37 – “For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”
Proverbs 15:28 says:
28 – The heart of the righteous studies how to answer, But the mouth of the wicked pours forth evil.
And so, looking again at our text here in 1 Peter, we live in a culture that’s stressed the very opposite of what Scripture is instructing here. Your femininity is best displayed in the beautiful character traits of a gentle and quiet spirit.
And women who are gentle are women who have embraced the feminine attribute of sensitivity toward others, wanting to nurture and build them up, wanting to listen to them and hear what they have to say so that they might pour out their beautiful, feminine attributes to that other person in ministry and care and concern and love and comfort.
And they will build their home on that foundation. Proverbs 14, verse 1, says:
1 – The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish pulls it down with her hands.
And so, ladies, I encourage you, embrace your femininity. It’s inside of you. And such an attitude can soften the heart of your husband, and I think you’ll find there’s more power in it than there ever was in clamorously demanding your husband’s love.
The problem with a woman clamorously demanding love from her husband is that she is displaying the more masculine attributes of subduing and taking dominion, which is a huge turnoff for men. It’s harder to love a woman who is displaying masculine traits. We are not built to be attracted to masculine traits.
Now if you’ve spent a lifetime trying to take dominion over your husband, even though you know Scripture has given him the headship, it’s going to be a huge adjustment. Just don’t do it so that you can bring change in your husband. Don’t do it because he will love you more. Do it because that’s what Yahweh created you to do, what He’s called you to be.
And you will be happiest there as long as your trust is in Yahweh rather than men. Verse 5…
1 Peter 3:5
5 – For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in Elohim also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,
In what manner? The gentle and quiet spirit. The holy women who trusted in Elohim, not man so much. This was their adorning. This was the clothing that they were wearing, this very attribute.
1 Peter 3:6
6 – as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.
You’re putting your trust in Yahweh. You’re not going to walk in fear. So a daughter of Sarah is this right here. That is the daughter of Sarah attribute– gentleness, quietness and a willingness to be submissive to their husbands. And in Sarah’s case, she even called him “adon,” or “lord.”
Now your adorning is your femininity, a hidden person of the heart, a gentle and quiet spirit that’s not corruptible. It can’t be corrupted. It is very precious in the sight of Elohim. He says “very precious in the sight of Elohim.” Do you want to be precious in the sight of Elohim? Think about that.
If you can embrace your femininity, Scripture says you’ll be very precious in the sight of Elohim, because you have done what He has created you to be. And I would say precious in the eyes of a lot of people.
I mean, look at the example of Ruth. There she was laying at the feet of Boaz, and he says to her… wow! He said:
10 – Then he said, “Blessed [are] you of YAHWEH, my daughter! For you have shown more kindness at the end than at the beginning, in that you did not go after young men, whether poor or rich.
11 – “And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you all that you request, for all the people of my town know that you [are] a virtuous woman.
What kind of woman was Ruth? Context…
7 – And after Boaz had eaten and drunk, and his heart was cheerful, he went to lie down at the end of the heap of grain; and she came softly, uncovered his feet, and lay down.
8 – Now it happened at midnight that the man was startled, and turned himself; and there, a woman was lying at his feet.
9 – And he said, “Who [are] you?” So she answered, “I [am] Ruth, your maidservant. Take your maidservant under your wing, for you are a close relative.”
Notice that she didn’t walk over to Boaz in the middle of the day, and say, “Do you know what? You got to marry me.” No, quietly went in, referred to herself as his maidservant, which is a term of submission to his headship, and made her request.
She never assumed anything for herself. She expressed a humble and grateful spirit toward Boaz when he gave her more grain and she was faithful to raise up a seed in her deceased husband’s name even to the point of leaving her family and following Naomi to her hometown.
Such was her love for her former husband, and Boaz honored her for that. Like it’s written in 1 Peter chapter 3.
5 – For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in Elohim also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,
6 – as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.
7 – Husbands, likewise, dwell with [them] with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as [being] heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
And that’s what Boaz did. He responded to this feminine attribute of humility, softness, gentleness, vulnerability, sensitivity by giving honor to her. Because that’s honorable behavior.
There is something innate built in the personality of men to want to take care of and protect the vulnerable and the weak. And a woman that doesn’t seem to act very vulnerable or sensitive or weak, but acts very headstrong and clamorous and rebellious, it just inhibits those innate desires in men to protect and bless and build up and honor.
It is no excuse for not doing so, men. I’m just telling you a little secret of how we’re constructed, how we’re built. We want to take care of something, somewhere. We want to take care of our women. We want to protect our women. It’s just built in.
And so, when we see someone operating in this way, we just can’t fathom hurting such a person, unless you’re just flat out evil. You can’t. But we men have lost what it means to be men, too. And we’re in a big mess in our generation.
I like the example of Mary as well. A beautiful woman, obviously. Highly favored by Yahweh. It says:
46 – And Mary said: “My soul magnifies YAHWEH,
47 – And my spirit has rejoiced in Elohim my Savior.
48 – For He has regarded the lowly state of His maidservant; For behold, henceforth all generations will call me blessed.
He saw her lowly state and He honored her. Yahweh Himself honored her.
49 – For He who is mighty has done great things for me, And holy [is] His name.
50 – And His mercy [is] on those who fear Him From generation to generation.
She was a very humble young woman. Yahweh honored her for that. She praised Yahweh for His mercy toward her and she knew that Yahweh looked upon her lowly state and exalted her. Because Yahweh’s strength is perfected in our weakness, right? And He did a mighty miracle in her, a miracle that has never been done before and never been done since.
Imagine being the one selected to nurture and love and nurse Yahweh’s only begotten Son. I don’t know if there is a higher position of honor than that.
So with feminine sensitivity and a nurturing spirit, I want to encourage women to embrace that femininity that Yahweh has instilled in you, that nurturing, the involvement of caring for the needs of your family genuinely, looking for what children may need, being proactive in trying to supply that need, looking for what the husband may need…
Being proactive in supplying that need. You see that mealtime is coming around. Have meals ready on time because you care about them being hungry. You see a child that’s having difficulty with something. Look to be their encourager to come along side of them to help them through it. Don’t stand over them and criticize and finger point.
Be sensitive to the physical and emotional pain your children and your husband are going through, because you were built to care for, to comfort, to nurture, to have mercy and love in a relationship at a deeper level that men may not ever achieve.
Be a listener. A quiet person has a greater opportunity to listen and learn. And when you listen and learn, you become wise. And the words you do speak will be words of wisdom coming from the law of kindness on your lips. And so, when you speak, speak in soft tones. And I can’t say that enough.
Being loud and clamorous and hard is not feminine. Having a gentle and quiet spirit is feminine and very precious in Yahweh’s eyes. Clothing your words in softness and gentleness with a tone of love and compassion and caring… That’s beautiful!
And your family and this world needs that from you. And such women can be powerful, powerful ministers in the body of the Messiah. And women don’t have to be teachers and pastors to be powerful ministers. Look what’s expected here of widows in the first century congregation.
9 – Do not let a widow under sixty years old be taken into the number, [and not unless] she has been the wife of one man,
10 – well reported for good works: if she has brought up children, if she has lodged strangers, if she has washed the saints’ feet, if she has relieved the afflicted, if she has diligently followed every good work.
See, their culture, I know, was constructed a little bit differently than ours we see today. But look at her roles: washing the saints’ feet, lodging strangers, relieving the afflicted, raising children. These are all wonderful examples of women who used their feminine character traits to minister to the body of the Messiah.
And the widows who manifested these traits had their needs taken care of. As they took care of the body of the Messiah, the body of the Messiah took care of them. It’s similar to a husband and wife relationship. Minister to Yahushua, your Bridegroom, and like a good husband, He will supply your every need.
That’s how a woman without children in the house, or even without a husband, can still function in this role, because the world needs your ministry. We do. The world needs it.
Now the word translated “brought up children,” the children don’t even have to be your own. You can be a mother or grandmotherly figure to a child, especially a daughter, who has been raised perhaps by a single father or an uncaring and unloving mother.
The Big Brothers and Big Sisters Organization perhaps could put you in touch with somebody. Or perhaps you see somebody in the assembly you attend. But the elderly, the elderly need your visits.
The body of the Messiah. If you, in a fellowship with a local congregation, if you’re there, I mean, there should be endless ministry opportunities there to serve. Really. Just open your eyes and pray for it.
Now, you know, when we host our Feast of Tabernacles every year, there are opportunities for women to serve… and men to serve. And it’s awesome! And I love to see it every year, everyone working, and it’s like a beautiful dance. I’ve heard it described as a dance. Everybody just kind of knows their place and things just kind of flow along.
Now one area where Yahweh did not give women is in leadership and authority over men. He did not give women that role.
1 Timothy 2:11 says:
11 – Let a woman learn in silence with all submission.
12 – And I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence.
13 – For Adam was formed first, then Eve.
The created order is the reason.
8 – For man is not from woman, but woman from man.
9 – Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man.
Woman, obviously, was created for the man. Now that does not mean that women are of lower status or worth than men. But Paul is taking us back to the order of creation. Woman was created for the man, not to be his authority figure, but to use her feminine gifts to be a help and support to the man.
Every army not only needs men to lead and go out to battle, but every army also needs the support troops to provide supplies, to provide the food, to make the food, the clothing, the equipment, to minister to the battle-wearied men so they can function more effectively.
And Yahweh gave women the supportive role so the men could be more effective in subduing and taking dominion over the earth through ministry. So for a women to be in silence and not take on the role of teaching and preaching doesn’t mean she is stupid or she is worthless.
It’s about respecting the created order and allowing men to do what Yahweh called men to do. And so, learning in silence is not about oppression. It’s about letting men be men and not trying to take on the masculine role of teaching other men.
That does not mean she can never teach anyone anything. Scripture has instruction for older women, as we looked at earlier, to teach the younger. And so, Yahweh still has a teaching role for women, especially if they are older. It’s just that she isn’t given the role of standing before a congregation and preaching to men.
That’s a time for her to learn in silence with submission and respect as an act of respect to the created order, her created purpose, letting men be men. If men aren’t being men, listen, that does not give you the license to take over. In fact, the void that exists there will draw attention to the need for male headship.
Now when I say this, I inevitably get asked about the example of Deborah and how she judged Israel and how she was a part of one of the battles. But remember, first of all, Deborah was the exception, not the rule. Why does it seem to be the rule nowadays rather than the exception?
But remember, Deborah was also a prophetess. That means her words were not even her words. They were Yahweh’s words.
In the absence of male leadership, it was the next best thing, and not out of the created order because Yahweh Himself was still the One speaking directly from the throne through her– “Thus saith Yahweh”– with the words He put in her mouth for judgment and for leadership.
And so, if a woman is really a prophetess, there would be no problem if there was a congregation who needed direction and she spoke, “Thus saith Yahweh, do this or do that.” It would be Yahweh’s direct words from the throne, not an exegesis of Scripture or some topical teaching somewhere, but direct words from on High.
Now Deborah only went to the battle at the direction and leadership of Barak. And when there was success, she said:
2 – “When leaders lead in Israel, When the people willingly offer themselves, Bless YAHWEH!
She rejoiced when leaders would lead. Another example people bring up is Aquila and Priscilla. It says:
24 – Now a certain Jew named Apollos, born at Alexandria, an eloquent man [and] mighty in the Scriptures, came to Ephesus.
25 – This man had been instructed in the way of YAHWEH; and being fervent in spirit, he spoke and taught accurately the things of YAHWEH, though he knew only the baptism of John.
26 – So he began to speak boldly in the synagogue. When Aquila and Priscilla heard him, they took him aside and explained to him the way of Elohim more accurately.
Now Aquila and Priscilla were a husband and wife team. They proclaimed and ministered in various ways. They were Paul’s traveling companions. At some point they had an assembly in their house. In this instance they saw that Apollos was in need of a more accurate explanation of the way of Elohim.
Now is there anything in this verse which would lead or prove that Priscilla did not walk in her role as a “help meet” and support to her husband?
A prominent Greek scholar by the name of A. T. Robertson makes the following comment about this verse, saying: “They took him unto them (proselabonto). Second aorist middle (indirect) indicative of proslambano, old verb, to their home and heart as a companion. Probably for dinner after service.”
And, actually, the NIV version, Acts 18:26 – He began to speak boldly in the synagogue. When Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they invited him to their home and explained to him the way of Elohim more adequately.
So it seems likely that Apollos was invited to their home, and since correcting Barnabas would take some time to do… or correcting Apollos would take some time to do… the reasonable thing would be to suggest they meet for dinner.
And in such a situation, it would make sense that Priscilla prepared the meals and did other support duties while Aquila took on the role of teaching. But they functioned together as a beautiful team of ministers to the saints. There is nothing here that proves Priscilla was doing the teaching and having authority over Apollos.
But Yahweh gave special roles to the husband and wife. When both of them are walking in those roles, as a ministry team, it is a beautiful picture of exactly how things are supposed to be.
And she performed her part in the task of explaining to him the way of Elohim more accurately by functioning as supply troops functioned and Aquila would function in his role.
But please, understand, my goal is not to suggest that women are of lower value or worth than men. Not at all. Not at all.
David had a statute in Israel. It says:
24 – “For who will heed you in this matter? But as his part [is] who goes down to the battle, so [shall] his part [be] who stays by the supplies; they shall share alike.”
25 – So it was, from that day forward; he made it a statute and an ordinance for Israel to this day.
So both receive the equal reward here– the men going out to battle and the supply troops behind them. And we can look at this and see it applies in a broader sense as well.
Yahushua said in Matthew 10:41:
41 – “He who receives a prophet in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet’s reward. And he who receives a righteous man in the name of a righteous man shall receive a righteous man’s reward.
What’s He talking about? The same thing David decreed in Israel. When women minister to the men, they receive the reward of those to whom they ministered.
So if, for instance, a woman was to wash this man’s feet, provide his meals for him, get him replenished and restored and back on the road, whatever reward he will get for turning people to righteousness, she will also receive.
See, Yahushua and His disciples always had a group of women that would follow them to do these things. Remember Yahushua said he who is greatest is a servant of all.
Don’t let the worldly definitions of value and worth deceive you into thinking you have no worth if you are not out there on the frontlines or if you function as the servant, because Yahushua was the greatest Servant who ever walked the earth and He is our example. And I’ve spoken with women who do love and appreciate that role.
You know, they will be in the background at some meeting somewhere and they are working. It wouldn’t be on a Sabbath day, but on a normal day. And they are working.
I’ll look, and I’ll say sometimes, “Well, you’re really heaping up some treasures for yourself, aren’t you?” Kind of sit back in the background, quietly going about your business. You get it, don’t you? And sometimes they’ll smile and acknowledge, “Yeah, I get that,” and rejoice in that role.
So looking again at Titus 2, notice that the older women are to teach the younger to love their husbands.
I couldn’t believe it. I watched a teaching one time where the guy said the woman did not have to love her husband. That’s crazy!
“To love their children.” Sometimes they have to be admonished in these areas. Embrace your role.
Too many women love their careers more. They show more love and devotion and time to their Facebooks and their Twitters and their blogs than they do to their husbands and their children. But, mama, your family needs you. It’s the little things that make all the difference in the world.
And it says “to be discreet.” This is a terrible translation. The word means: “of a sound mind, sane, of one’s senses,” “curbing one’s desires and impulses, self-controlled, temperate.”
So, it has to do with being in control of your emotions. A younger woman is encouraged by the older woman to also maintain the attribute of being chaste, which would be: “something exciting reverence, venerable, sacred,” “pure,” “pure from carnality, chaste, modest,” “pure from every fault, immaculate,” and “clean.”
All very wonderful feminine attributes for you to consider. And here comes the more controversial one, which we see here: “homemakers.” It’s the one that speaks to our culture today. And this word in the Greek, I’m going to give you several lexicons and they all say the same thing…
Thayer’s has: “caring for the house, working at home, the (watch or) keeper of the house, keeping at home and taking care of household affairs, a domestic.”
Friberg Lexicon says: “of one preoccupied with domestic affairs working at home… working at home… working at home… domestic homemaker.”
UBS Greek Dictionary: “devoted to home duties.”
Louw-Nida Lexicon: “homemaker… one who works in the home – one who takes care of the home, a homemaker.”
I mean, this is the expectation for the older women to be teaching this to the younger women. Somewhere along the lines it didn’t happen. The older women either didn’t teach the younger women or the younger women didn’t want to listen. And that’s the expectation, though, for thousands of years.
It’s not until modern times we’ve seen women departing from the household, sticking their kids in daycare centers and nurseries and building a career for themselves. But this is inspired text. It’s inspired text. You cannot escape it. This is Yahweh’s will for you.
And it is evident to me the homemaker role is Yahweh’s will because the very opposite is pretty much the teachings of Lenin and Stalin who wanted to pull women out of the house and let the state become the primary teacher and caretaker of children. A very crafty way of stealing children’s hearts and it has been very effective I might add.
But it’s Yahweh’s will that women be home with their babies and their children so they can give their little ones the security and the love that enables them to be like the quieted soul of the weaned child with its mother.
Children who are so highly valued and prized by their mothers that they came out of infant and toddler years with a strong sense of self-worth and security.
But today baby formula, daycare centers and careers have taken the place of true biblical motherhood and femininity in America.
Now listen, if you are a single mother, please understand, I’m not trying to put you down. I’m not trying to say you are a bad person. If you are in this situation because you were willing to practice fornication, this is one of the reasons why Yahweh said don’t do that, don’t practice fornication.
If you are in this situation because you had to separate or be divorced from an abusive husband, you know, don’t repeat the same mistake of marrying an abusive husband or practicing fornication. Look to your fathers, look to other wise men and elders in the congregation, to help guide you before you even decide to get married again.
I mean, tell you what, men know men… for the most part. We know men and we can read between the lines and not get all giddy with the romantic aspects there and kind of see what’s going on, what’s really happening.
But, you know, there are men out there who aren’t really ready to be married yet. They don’t know how to be men. They don’t understand that biblical masculinity does not mean controlling those under you and demanding respect, but rather leading and calling people forward rather than driving from behind and operating in such a way that commands respect.
A lot of men don’t understand respect or leadership. A lot of men don’t understand that leadership is not sitting on a throne firing off orders, but walking in Yahushua’s walk as a servant.
But for women who are married, I hope you will take the admonition of Scripture and return home if you are out there chasing careers and trying to double your income and move on and become more wealthy. You may have to lower your standard of living, but we can’t reject the idea that’s so very clearly in the Scriptures as Yahweh’s will for women.
To walk in any other way but what’s written here is to cause the Word of Elohim to be blasphemed. I wouldn’t want to be guilty of that.
Now when I speak of homemaking, I don’t necessarily mean that women cannot contribute toward household income. They can.
A good example of that is Proverbs chapter 31.
10 – Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth [is] far above rubies.
11 – The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain.
12 – She does him good and not evil All the days of her life.
13 – She seeks wool and flax, And willingly works with her hands.
She’s a busy lady.
14 – She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar.
15 – She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants.
So the husband trusts her. She is in a right relationship with her husband. That’s an important foundation. And we see the virtuous woman is a worker. She is not a lazy woman. She works willingly with her hands to run the household. And we see her focus is on the home. She is not focused on a career and being a busybody and wasting her time.
And it says:
16 – She considers a field and buys it; From her profits she plants a vineyard.
Of course, under the headship of her husband. She doesn’t just go out and say, “Well, I’m going to go buy a field, husband, because you can’t stop me. Proverbs tells me.” No, it’s all under this guise that he safely trusts her to make right decisions because she has demonstrated a virtuous character trait.
17 – She girds herself with strength, And strengthens her arms.
18 – She perceives that her merchandise [is] good, And her lamp does not go out by night.
19 – She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hand holds the spindle.
20 – She extends her hand to the poor, Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
So she is putting the needs of other people ahead of her own needs, even the need of sleep. Now notice that she is also able out of the overflow of her labor to bless the poor and the needy as well. She is literally overflowing with an abundance of blessings for her house and with this abundance helps support the needy.
What a blessed house this is describing here.
21 – She is not afraid of snow for her household, For all her household [is] clothed with scarlet.
22 – She makes tapestry for herself; Her clothing [is] fine linen and purple.
23 – Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land.
He is a respected man. They say behind every great man is a great woman? Her support, I would suggest, is part of what made this man be in this position.
24 – She makes linen garments and sells [them], And supplies sashes for the merchants.
This is all from the home, not going to some far away city to work every day.
25 – Strength and honor [are] her clothing; She shall rejoice in time to come.
She sees strength and honor being her adorning, not what’s the outward adorning so much. Her clothing is her character. Her adorning is her works. As we read earlier, this kind of adornment is Yahweh’s will for us.
26 – She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue [is] the law of kindness.
So her conversation is not like the clamorous voice of unbelievers. It’s the wise voice, the gentle, quiet voice of wisdom and kindness and love. On her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 – She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness.
She doesn’t sit around. She is not a busybody.
28 – Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband [also], and he praises her:
29 – “Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all.”
So idleness is your enemy to virtuosity in women… and men, too. But look at her. She is blessed.
30 – Charm [is] deceitful and beauty [is] passing, But a woman [who] fears YAHWEH, she shall be praised.
31 – Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates.
You see what this virtuous woman reaps for her labors– kindness, a true fear of Elohim. Her children call her blessed. Her husband praises her. Her own fruits and works praise her. And we see by this example the high degree of love and care this woman has for her children, for her household.
This is in stark contrast to the more career-minded mentality woman are taught to value today. So I say, listen, mothers, embrace your femininity and learn to love your role as keeper of the house and mother to your children.
You could spend four years in college only to realize your babies and your children need you at home…
And that your children need to be schooled at home to be properly protected from people who will ultimately want to feed them the homosexual agenda and other damnable doctrines and ideas and also protect them from children who have not had the foolishness, which is bound up in the heart of children, driven far from them.
15 – Foolishness [is] bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him.
And so, they become a companion of fools rather than walking with wise men.
20 – He who walks with wise [men] will be wise, But the companion of fools will be destroyed.
It’s the children who need to be the primary influence in… I’m sorry, it’s the parents who need to be the primary influence in their children’s lives… not evolution, not evolution-touting school teachers and textbooks that are craftily written to undermine their faith and lead them to secularism and humanism.
Your children need you. The construction of your body shows you what Yahweh created you to do– to nurture, to value, to care for, to comfort, to love, to lead your children to security and self-worth. Take all that energy you’ve been pouring into the career and pour it into your home life and your children, and they will rise up and call you blessed.
Now what if your husband wants you to pursue a career? Maybe he’s got a little, you know, riches on his mind. He doesn’t want to lower his standard of living. He doesn’t want to go through all that. So I would encourage you to have him watch and read this study. The will of Yahweh could hardly be any clearer. I can’t see how it could be any clearer.
And if your husband is wanting you to disobey Scripture, then you need to pray and at the right time make a humble appeal. Make a humble appeal and explain you are conflicted with following the will of Yahweh and following what your husband is telling you to do. You feel that you are disobeying Scripture.
And, hopefully, he will hear you. But if not and after you’ve prayed, and he is still firm with his decision– although, I really think if you do it right, that won’t happen– I would say, you need to go ahead and do what Yahweh says first.
And what if you have no children? Maybe the will of Yahweh you are confused about, but there are women who need your ministry, too.
There are children who are growing up in dysfunctional families who need your ministry. There’s a body of Messiah who needs your ministry. The world around you needs your ministry. And, more importantly, you husband needs your ministry.
And I recommend young women, especially, remain in their father’s household until they are married. And you can partly learn how to be the kind of wife to your future husband by being a help to your father in his work, in his household. You can be. You can be a blessing and learn what it means to be a homemaker while at home and blessing your father.
If you can’t do that, okay. Maybe you have to work outside the home. But maybe find some kind of work that would involve caring for children, caring for the elderly, caring for, you know, some kind of care giving kind of job that will help you in your, hopefully, future home.
But when you start pouring your energy into your household, ladies, and you see how blessed it is, it really… it’s empowering.
I mean, you and your husband could be an Aquila and Priscilla team each functioning in that important role of ministry to this lost and dying world, caring for the sick, ministering to the orphans and the widows in their trouble.
27 – Pure and undefiled religion before Elohim and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, [and] to keep oneself unspotted from the world.
I have much more to say on this topic, but I felt I should at least touch on these key areas. I have an additional study called “The Role of Women in the Body of Messiah” at: eliyah.com/women.html.
There are so many things to do. Just ask Yahweh to lead you and be sensitive to the doors of opportunity He will open up for you. And through it all, glory in your femininity. It’s Yahweh given. Don’t be ashamed of it. Glory in it that Yahweh has blessed you with unique attributes that are not so prevalent to men.
You are a precious gift from Yahweh to men. Don’t ever lose sight of that. Embrace your femininity and praise Yahweh for it, because when Yahweh created Adam, He initially brought, you know, all these different kinds of animals to him and none of them were suitable.
I think He kind of wetted Adam’s appetite, so when He finished His work by creating woman from man, he would really appreciate her for the gift that she is to him. Don’t ever lose sight of who you are– a gift from Yahweh, a companion and fellow heir to the grace of life. Let’s pray.
O Father Yahweh, I just pray that in Yahushua’s name, glorify Your great name, Father. I pray that You would use this teaching to touch the hearts of women all across this world today who are being fed a false notion of what it means to be a women.
I pray, Father Yahweh, that if there are any lingering doubts in anyone who is within the sound of this prayer that You would resolve them, instruct them, help them to continue their study and their practice in what You have revealed.
I pray for Your mercy upon our families. I pray that You would restore our families to a proper order, the order that You created us to live within.
I pray that both men and women would embrace the role and the calling that You have given to each of us and that You would cause us to be effective and selfless and merciful and wise in how we conduct our affairs on the earth.
And we look forward to Your Kingdom. We ask for Your provision on the journey toward the age to come and deliverance from the enemy and forgiveness where we have failed You.
For truly Yours is the Kingdom and power and glory and majesty. And we praise You for creating us unique and we celebrate the differences that we are and that we have with each other.
Now we pray that we could work together in unity and harmony and be evermore effective in reaching out to the next generation and reaching out to this lost and dying world, and through it all, glorify Your great name.
For truly Yours is the Kingdom and power and glory and majesty forever and ever. In the name of Your Son, Yahushua, we pray. Amein.